We all think that we are okay. We think that it did not and will not affect us. In retrospect, we are so foolishly living in our own world of lies just to protect ourselves.To protect our hearts, emotions and most of all, suppressing the hurt. We do not want to be vulnerable infront of others because in this world system that we're living in, being vulnerable is no less than being weak. Who wants to be weak when what everybody else wanted is to be strong? Yet, i've come to realised that pushing it aside surely does not make it go away. It's like keeping a storage box at the far end corner of a storeroom. We stack things over it, covering and blocking it, making it hidden from our line of sight. However, it doesn't mean that the box is not there just because we do not see it when we open up the door. Reality is that, it still is. Whether we like it or not, it's still taking up space no matter how long it has passed.
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It may seemed like an unending fight for everyday we battle within ourselves to make the right decisions. The entity of being right is so subjective these days that we ended up being even more confused. It appears as though everyone has their own definition of being right and wrong. Only the One who created the heaven and earth knows exactly what is right and wrong. He knows the blueprint of every minute detail. Those which have not been altered by men. When He created us, all those stuffs that are in us right now, at this moment was maybe not meant to be there but along the way, we chose the path which eventually leads us to where we are today. We were created to be whole in Him. It's not through things which have the resemblance of Him.
One day, i'll relive those memories and i know i'll walk out of it victoriously because i have Jesus to pick up my heart and help me through. One day, someday. As for now, i'm just thankful that when i reflect upon my life, i know that He is as faithful as always. When i'm down, broken and shattered, i know i don't have to act like i'm strong enough infront of Him because He is strong enough for me. And that, is all i need to know.
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